Science Fiction and Fantasy
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Fleming: Jeez, take notes, why don'tcha?
Elrod: I am.
Fleming: What is that gizmo?
Elrod: It's a digital recorder.
Fleming: I thought it was a cigarette box, only I can smell that you don't smoke.
Elrod: Sensitive sense of smell, yes, go on.
Fleming: When I bother to breathe, that is. I like that perfume by the way.
Elrod: Oh. Thank you!
Fleming: You don't have to dump in on, though.
Elrod: Hey!
Fleming: It's okay, I don't mind.
Elrod: Back to your powers, wise-ass.
Fleming: Jeez, you make me out like I'm some kinda super guy, but it's part of the package when I woke up undead that night on the beach. I got the night vision and good hearing. And I figured out how to hypnotize people—which isn't polite, by the way—but the best one is being able to disappear.
Elrod: You turn into a mist?
Fleming: No I just vanish. Like this—
Elrod: YOW! WHERE ARE YOU?
Fleming: Right here.
Elrod: YEEEEE!
Fleming: Calm down! It's no big deal.
Elrod: It sure as hell IS!
Fleming: I guess so. I've gotten used to it. Sure tires me out, though. I get hungry.
Elrod: Er...hungry?
Fleming: Yeah, and you know what THAT means.
Elrod: Is that a trick question?
Fleming: Cool your motor, honey, you're safe. I'll just stop at the Stockyards and top off my tank before I turn in for the day.
Elrod: That's a relief.
Fleming: Not for the cows, and lemme tell you it is HELL on my shoes. Usually I vanish and float in, especially when it's muddy.
Elrod: Why don't you get some galoshes?
Fleming: Galoshes?
Elrod: Yeah.
Fleming: Galoshes.
Elrod: You pull them on. They protect your shoes.
Fleming: I KNOW what they are, ya dizzy dame.
Elrod: Well, don't bite my head off!
Fleming: You should be so lucky.
Elrod: I'd rather have Escott.
Fleming: Hey—I heard that!
Elrod: We're done here. Where's Escott?
Fleming: He heard you were coming and hid behind the bar.
Escott: I most certainly did not. Ms. Elrod, I am Charles Escott. Please pay no attention to Mr. Fleming. I am delighted to finally make your acquaintance.
Elrod: Likewise, I'm sure. Golly, you're taller in person.
Escott: And you're far more charming than I was led to believe.
Elrod: Why, thank you!
Escott: I'm sure Jack has some bartending duties to occupy himself. Why don't you and I go for a drive? It would be my very great pleasure to take you on a tour of some of the locations that have figured in "The Vampire Files".
Elrod: Oh, that would be fantastic, Mr. Escott!
Escott: Please...call me Charles.
Elrod: Charles...
Fleming: Oh, jeez.
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