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The divorce rate is stuck near 50%, and it is pretty clear that our current romantic situation is far from ideal. So, with Valentine's Day fast approaching, I have a radical solution-we need to start relying less on romance and more on science. I know that this sounds somewhat bizarre, but the simple truth is that while we have continued to bumble along romantically in much the same fashion as always, science has made great strides in understanding the secret springs of attraction.
Once you open yourself to the possibility of science as your guide, you will quickly find that there are a slew of studies that can help you in a variety of unexpected ways. Let me give you a few examples. During my interviews, I discovered that many people found the modern world of dating so bewildering that they no longer even had a clear sense of what they should be looking for in a partner. If you have ever experienced this feeling, there is a quick and easy way to cut through the clutter: we most value those qualities about our partners that we value about ourselves, according to research. So, all you really need to figure out is what you like about yourself. If your favorite personal quality is kindness, then that is what you should seek in another (in fact, according to one study, we want a partner who is better than we are, so ideally you would find someone who is even more kind than you are).
















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