Twelve-year-old Raisin Rodriguez has been uprooted from her life in California and plopped down in Philadelphia with her mother, sister, step-father, step-sister Samantha, and Samantha's cross-dressing poodle Countess. The only way Raisin can survive the painful transition is by recording every detail in a secret blog she keeps for her best friends from home.
Raisin shares her latest musings and spills about every humiliating incident that prevents her new friendships from taking off. She even describes the arrival of her dreaded period, just after her thirteenth birthday. But humiliation doesn't begin to cover what Raisin experiences when someone at her new school discovers her blog and prints it out for the world to see.
This hilariously painful and heartbreakingly hysterical novel offers a glimpse into the mind and heart of a truly unique character with an unforgettable voice.
Sunday, September 12
6:06 PM, EST
Dear Pia and Claudia,
Welcome to TwoScoopsofRaisin.com. Aka my blog. I know there are many blogs out there to choose from. Your choice to read mine is much appreciated.
Why keep a blog? you ask.
Excellent question, I answer.
There are many reasons to keep a blog. Here are just a few I've come up with:
1. You just moved to Philadelphia--far, far away from your two best friends in the world and you need a way to keep in touch.
2. You'd prefer using the phone, but your new stepsister is constantly hogging it. (Though it's a mystery who she's talking to. She doesn't seem to have a lot of friends.)
3. You'd prefer using the phone, but you were born without a tongue.
Or
4. You like the word blog because it sounds funny.
All of these are good reasons. No one reason is better than another. It just so happens that in my case, reasons one and two apply. Someone else might find reason four to be the most fitting. Another person might recognize his or herself in reason three. If you are that person, I suggest seeking the help of a health-care professional.
I hope you enjoy my blog. Feel free to check for new updates as often as you like. Please do not feel free, under any circumstances, on pain of death, to give the address of this blog to anyone. This blog is very personal and confidential and deals with mature subject matter.
Additionally, unauthorized reading could potentially result in harmful side effects such as eye twitching, sudden memory loss, dry mouth, and butt acne.
Thank you for flying Raisin.
Monday, September 13
4:07 PM, EST
Hello Kitties,
Today I made out with my earth science book. Well, not the book so much as the boy on the cover of the book. We met this morning during seventh-grade orientation at Franklin Academy. Turns out there are more social opportunities at my new school than I had imagined. . . . It's just a matter of knowing where to look.
Which in this case was right in front of my face.
After orientation, I was sitting at my kitchen table, putting covers on all my textbooks like we're supposed to. But when it came time to cover him up, I didn't have the heart to do it. He looked so irresistible, with his hair all floppy and his teeth all gleaming white. And his eyes! They were practically shouting out to the world, "Kiss me, I'm stuck on this book cover." So I laid one on him. I couldn't help myself, really. It was bigger than the both of us. I must say, though, that for a piece of cardboard he's quite the kisser. . . .
Sometimes there's just no explaining what goes on between a man and a woman.
Go ahead. Call me crazy. But don't forget, I've been through a lot lately.
Let's review:
I was minding my own business, happily living in Berkeley, when my mom and dad decided to get a divorce.
My mother invented Ice Dogs and Liver Quivers (the frozen treats for dogs).
Horace bought the company from her.
They fell in love and decided to get married.
My mother moved to Philly to be with him and brought me (and Lola) along with her.
You guys, who I love and depend on (especially for preventing me from doing weird things like kissing boys on book covers), had to stay in Berkeley.
And here I am, all by my lonesome.
So I can't really be held responsible for my actions in my present state of mind. (If anyone should be held responsible, it's probably my mother, no?) Especially now that I've discovered a new bad side effect to moving: STARTING OVER IN A NEW SCHOOLLFHGFHfoocooa093]. 'IURFrURLKFJLK dhkhv;h '/9u vvguv;v xihclipopup9UhgHIOXUJIIFU;Oi./J/qo
SORRY! That was Lola. She loves to pound on my keyboard and say, "I'm doing my work." It makes her feel important. As if speaking those four words will get everyone wondering what important scientific discoveries she's making and forget that she's still in Pull-Ups. And I begged my mother to leave her behind when weTTTTTT Gvkjfha;fh;ffj p f f;kKHO IHOIIHOIHOIHOIHOIHOPDIw pjdlkjkjlkjoioijo;ijjhkjhgffdfd d1119999999Jeez Louise! With all the fancy computers around here, I don't know why she has to choose my laptop. I think she just likes being on my bed. Maybe it's the purple velvet comforter. Or the fact that there aren't any safety guards . . .
I suppose I should put in a DVD for her or something. Why must I take care of a toddler on the eve of my first official day of classes? Isn't that the responsibility of my mom and stepdad? I know they have a business to run, but I've got a big day tomorrow.
I should be running a bubble bath. Sipping some chamomile tea. Connecting with my higher power. Or at least watching E! Entertainment Television in order to prepare me with some intelligent conversation starters.
Ugh, I better go, she won't stop licking my arm.
Q&A with author Judy Goldschmidt
What made you decide to write this book?
All roads lead to Crest White Strips. One day my friend Lynn (not to be confused with the Lynn in the book) was using them to bleach her teeth, and I wondered whether they'd work on hair too. Not to bleach the whole head, just to make some buttery blonde highlights. This seemed like a question a character in a book would ponder. So I thought I'd try to write a book around this character.
Where did you come up with the name Raisin Rodriguez?
A friend of mine had a daughter in kindergarten. She mentioned her daughter's classmate Raisin and I thought it was the funniest name I ever heard. And of course, the only name funnier than Raisin is Raisin Rodriguez.
Which of Raisin's characteristics would you most like to have and why?
I'd like to be as funny as Raisin. She's much quicker on her feet than I am.
Raisin was horrified when her blog was discovered...what was your most
embarrassing moment in school?
My class was sent to help clean up a homeless shelter. I was told to vacuum the elevators. I plugged the vacuum into a socket next to the elevator. Two cute boys got into the elevator and before I had time to unplug the vacuum, they pushed the down button. I was straddling the cord and as the elevator descended, the cord climbed up my leg at such a rapid pace, it almost sliced me in half. I was so terrified, I screamed bloody murder. The cord finally snapped
right before anything bad happened, but not in time to save me from looking like a huge idiot in front of the cute boys.
Were you a good student?
It's like this: I was born with the knowledge of a seventh grader. So up until eighth grade I sailed through school. Then, once I had to actually learn things, I couldn't do it. It was too difficult to concentrate when there were outfits to plan,
conversations to rehearse, boys to flirt with, etc.
What was your favorite book growing up?
Catcher in the Rye. It felt as if J.D. Salinger was writing things he stole from my thoughts. Then I grew up and realized that everyone thinks that. Which is the beauty of that book.
What adjectives would you use to describe your book?
Frizzy. Funny. Feminine hygiene-ey.
What's your favorite beauty tip?
I haven't tried it yet, but I recently read about someone who drank a lot of water with fresh lemon juice. She says it made her skin look radiant. I would like my skin to look radiant. I just keep forgetting to buy the lemons.
What were your friends like when you were 13?
I went to a private religious school. I think we were all a little late to the party. After the first and only time we ever played spin the bottle, my friend Carol called me and said "Now I've done it all."
Do you like tuna casserole?
Yes. My school served it for lunch. The problem was that whenever they served it, everyone would talk about how disgusting it was. So I couldn't eat it because I didn't want to be uncool. But I pined for it. I think in eighth grade I finally took a stand and ate some. But I got a lot of "eews" and never did it again.
Who did you have a crush on when you were 13?
Almost all the boys in my class. Even the weird science geek. There was a period when we would stay after school every day and have intense discussions. But during school hours, we never even talked to each other. It was as if we had some kind of unspoken agreement.
Life motto?
I don't have one, but now that you mention it, I'm going to start looking.
