Fans of the Cat Who... series get an intimate look at the private lives of those extraordinary Siamese cats Koko and Yum Yum--the most unlikely, most unusual, most delightful team in detective fiction.
In this charming collection of feline antics, readers will discover why Qwill considers Koko a veritable clone of T.S. Eliot's Rum Tum Tugger, how Yum Yum was rescued from a burglar who is not above a spot of catnapping, and many more fascinating cat facts.
Chapter One
enter:
kao k'o kung, howling
I'll never forget those days! I was getting my life
back on track. I had a job, writing features for
the Daily Fluxion. I had a place to live, an apartment
on the ground floor of an old mansion. And
soon I would be getting a roommate!
My landlord, who was art critic for the Fluxion,
lived upstairs with his art treasures and a
Siamese called Kao K'o Kung. Although I knew
nothing about cats, I was enlisted for cat-sitting
when the critic was out of town.
He wrote his reviews at home and never went
near the news office. According to conventional
wisdom, he never went near the art galleries either,
but wrote his nasty criticism off the top of
his head. Among local artists he was well hated,
to coin a phrase. So no one was surprised when
he was murdered in his own backyard.
That was the first time I heard the cat's "death
howl," a bloodcurdling experience!
Kao K'o Kung-that smart cat!-then walked
downstairs and moved in with me. I recall giving
him some turkey from the Press Club that I had
been saving for myself.
So here we were! Thrown together by fate!
First thing I did, I changed his name to Koko.
He made no objection. He knew which side
his bread was buttered on! In the days that followed
we invented games to play, both athletic
and intellectual. I was at work all day but made
up for it by reading to him every evening-either
the Daily Fluxion or the dictionary; he was not
particular.
Then I began to find fault with the old mansion.
It seemed to be the ancestral domain of
a dynasty of moths, which were eating holes in
my bathrobe and neckties. But where could I
move? Apartments in my price range specified
"no pets allowed." I discussed the problem with
Koko, who listened thoughtfully. I told him that
a friend of mine was going to Europe for three
months and had suggested that I house-sit.
Koko squeezed his eyes. We were getting to be
pals. Then, to my surprise, he turned out be a
self-appointed bodyguard and somewhat of a
bloodhound!
One day he wanted to go upstairs to his old
haunt. The murdered man's treasures had been
removed, but I had a key to the apartment and
the supply of cat litter. But that cat seemed to
have his own urgent reason; he ran up and down
the stairs ahead of me in anticipation.
Sure enough, there was a large tapestry still
hanging in a hallway, and Koko was determined to
paw his way behind it. When I went to his assistance,
I discovered a door back there, which the
landlord had found it advisable to conceal. It led
downstairs to a small ground-floor apartment in
the rear of the building, and it was filled with
clues to the recent crime. It had been used as an
artist's studio and still had an odor of turpentine.
Just as I was snooping around in amazement
and Koko was getting some kind of early high
from the paintbrushes, I heard a key turn in the
rear door leading to the backyard, and a big man
walked in. For a moment we were both frozen in
surprise. Then he looked about wildly, grabbed
a palette knife, and came at me!
Before I could find a chair to swing at him,
Koko threw a catfit! The room seemed filled with
snarling animals, attacking him from all sides
with claws extended! I was able to clobber the
guy, and we left him on the floor while we called
the police. Koko spent the next few hours licking
his claws.
* * *
I was glad to move into my friend's posh
apartment on the fifteenth floor of the Villa
Verandah. Koko seemed happy, too. I think he
liked the view. Then one day I came home from
work and found a large hole in the green wool
upholstery of a fine wing chair. As I examined it,
with horror, Koko jumped onto the chair seat
and upchucked a green fur ball-still moist!
I immediately phoned the Press Club bartender,
who always had the answer to all questions.
He listened and said wisely, "Sounds like an
emotional problem. You need a psycatatrist. I
can tell you where to find one."
It sounded like a hoax, especially since the
address he gave me was on the edge of the red-light
district. And I was even more suspicious
when I phoned for an appointment and was told
to come alone without the cat ... but I was desperate!
I reported for the consultation.
It was a tawdry house, but there were cats on
every windowsill, and that was promising. I was
welcomed by a kindly woman in a faded housedress
accompanied by at least a dozen cats who
seemed quite well adjusted. She ushered me
into the parlor and gave me a cup of tea with the
inevitable cat hair floating in it. No matter.
What I learned, after stating the problem, was
this: Siamese, when troubled, become wool
eaters. My ties and bathrobe were undoubtedly
wool. Koko was lonely because he was accustomed
to having someone at home all day. He
needed a nice little Siamese female for a companion.
Neutering would make no difference.
They would be quite sweet to each other.... I
found this concept extremely interesting.
Now all I had to do was find a little female
Siamese....
Panic time! Here I was-a lifelong cat illiterate-involved
in matchmaking between temperamental
Siamese! I phoned the Press Club
bartender for advice once more.
"Call the catteries listed in the Yellow Pages,"
he said with authority. "Check the classified ads
in the paper. Call the pet hospitals!"
I did. My efforts turned up only one available
candidate, and the asking price was more than
my weekly paycheck at the Fluxion. I was just
getting back on my feet financially. I needed to
make a down payment on a used car.
Meanwhile I was afraid to leave Koko alone in
the borrowed apartment; he might start eating
the rugs! Once, as a test, I shut him up in the
bathroom, and he howled so continuously and
with such volume that there were five complaints
to the manager.
Someone suggested selling Koko; it would
solve the whole problem.
I considered that unthinkable. Already I felt a
kinship with him that was hard to explain.
I'll never forget the frantic search for a companion
who would stop Koko from eating wool!
"Braun reigns supreme as the queen of the cat cozies."—Publishers Weekly
"A master of mystery."—People
"The feelings produced by reading about Qwill and his pals can best be compared to that coziest of feelings—having a purring cat on your lap."—Booklist